Cohabitation and Divorce Rate
Cohabitation is defined as living together in a sexual relationship without being married. Since the 1960s, there has been a steady increase in the number of unmarried cohabitants. In 1960, a total of 439,000 in the United States reported that they were cohabitating with a person of the opposite sex. By 2000, the U.S. Bureau of the Census reported that this number had risen to 5.5 million.
A lot of marriages (a legally sanctioned union between a man and a woman) are now preceded by cohabitation, but in contrast to common-sense notions about the advantages of cohabitation before marriage, data on divorce patterns show that there is a greater risk of marital breakup among people who cohabitated. (Whitbourne, 2001)
I did some research (mainly with books, since all the papers on-line were not for free) and would like to share what I learned about the negative effects of cohabitation on long-term relationship.
There are five main reasons people engage in cohabitation. Economic advantages from sharing living expenses, less complicated dissolution when the relationship doesn’t work out, availability of more time to spend together, more opportunities to share sexual and emotional intimacy without getting married, and a way to “test” compatibility turned out to be the biggest reasons in general. If we look at these reasons more closely among the older adults, age groups of 40 and over, it turns out that most of the adults choose cohabitation as a means of avoiding marriage. They tend to avoid marriage to prevent their loss of financial benefits such as alimony, welfare, and pension checks. Fear of losing another spouse either by death or divorce is another factor, along with the pain and anger as a result of divorce.
Enormous amount of data show that health is negatively correlated to cohabitation.
Non-married people feel less healthy and have higher rates of mortality than the married- about 50 percent higher among woman and 250 percent higher among men. Also, cohabitating with number of different partners is proven to greatly increase the possibility of acquiring one or more STDs (sexually transmitted diseases). In addition, married are more likely to maintain better sex lives and generally feel more secure and healthy. Especially when it comes to pregnancy, women who are cohabitors tend to feel insecure and suffer greater amount of stress in general than married women, which is directly related to increased alcohol consumption, smoking, violence, and depression.
Much of the studies were consistent in showing negative effects on long-time relationship among cohabitants. This might not apply to all couples who undergo cohabitation, but it is definitely worth thinking about this problem in planning one’s life. I didn’t cover it here in my blog, but further research has revealed that remarriage after cohabitation also resulted in higher divorce rate.
Doctors and psychologists recommend having self-esteem and confidence about oneself and not to be engaged in series of cohabitation for mental and physical reasons.
Well, relationship is life, and nothing would be more important than having a happy and satisfying one. I hope my blog has given out some useful information, and I wish good luck to you all!!
Other sources sited:
Trends in marriage and cohabitation: the decline in marriage and the changing pattern of living in partnership. John Haskey, Population Trends 80; Summer 1995; OPCS
Premarital cohabitation and the probability of subsequent divorce: Analysis using new data from the General Household Survey, John Haskey, Population Trends 68: OPCS, HMSO (London 1992)
Posted by clearsky83
posted by PWH @ 10:02 PM
20 comments
20 Comments:
This article was really really interesting. I never thought that cohabiting with someone could have negative effects on your health. I wonder why pregnant women who are cohabitors tend to suffer from a greater amount of stress. I also want to know why cohabiting with someone would increase chances of divorce.
i found this very interesting. I would have liked to see comparisons between divorce rates when it was taboo to cohabitate compared to now. Do you think this change has to do with the changes in peopled beliefs and morals overtime and not simply cohabitating. In the past when people didnt cohabitate many also didnt beleive in divorce. Now many things are becoming more acceptable and do you think this might be part of the correlation it seems like there are too many variables to really have an exact answer. However beyond this i still think it is interesting and something to definately keep in mind.
This blog interested me, mainly because I recently learned about cohabitation in my sociology class. It was a good recap of all of the information that I learned about, like why many women decided not to remarry for financial reasoning and why divorce rates are higher for those that cohabit prior to marriage than those that don't. It was an interesting blog, good job!
-gurneyk6
I thought this article was very interesting. We are all pretty familiar with the stresses, strains, and sacrifices of marriage by either witnessing the dynamics between our parents and close relatives or by getting married ourselves. However, it’s not often that we think about those same difficulties when it comes to cohabitation. Although you have defined cohabitation as two people “living together in a sexual relationship without being married,” cohabitation does occur between people who are not sexually involved and it is not clear whether all of the statistics cited pertain to that definition of the term. It may not be very likely for a man and a woman to reside in close quarters and not feel some attraction or be in a romantic relationship, but it is certainly possibly. If two people of the opposite sex can be “just friends,” then perhaps they can cohabitate and still be “just friends.” Also, one or both of the co-ed cohabitants may be homosexual and often times multiple people will share a residence, not merely two people.
In any event, I don’t think that cohabitation necessarily causes divorce just because a majority of couples do cohabitate before marriage and divorce rates are on the rise. Cohabitation is a good way to get to know someone such as a potential life partner. It seems perfectly logical to live with someone that you intend to marry before you make that vow to spend (and live with) that person for the rest of your life. On the other hand, some factors I do believe contribute to divorce is getting married for the wrong reasons such as to help with finances or to fill some emotional void, not living together long enough before getting married, and simply falling out of love.
This is not to say that I do not believe that cohabitation between romantically involved people cannot be just as stressful as being in a marriage. When lovers live together for a long period of time, it almost is as if they were married. Still, if the relationship is not working out and living together is no longer bearable, it should be easier to part ways provided that there aren’t any legalities or children to hinder that decision. Maybe cohabitants continue to live together for the same reasons as those who are in strained marriages on the brink of divorce, i.e. the financial and emotional support. Or perhaps some thread of love still remains. But when love comes at the cost of one’s health and happiness, that person is failing to love him or her self. And when the costs of love outweigh its benefits, it is only doing more harm than good to the parties involved. Then one must ask oneself, “Is love worth the misery, despair, and self-destruction? Is it worth losing my soul over? Is that what love is all about?” And should that answer be “no,” then maybe it’s time to move on (and move out).
When we live in a society where a large percent of married couples will eventually divorce, I find this blog very interesting. Everyone is trying to determine why our relationships are not lasting as long as they did in the past, and perhaps it is due to the openness of sexuality in society today, or perhaps the increase in cohabitation. As a college student, I have seen many relationships where the individuals lived in proximity to one another, and the relationship ended badly and quickly. This so called "dorm-cest" is quite commonplace in the Freshman dorms where such students are generally more concerned with filling the relationship void, as pointed out in this blog, than searching for someone who they really like. Now, we can attribute this to many things like laziness, impatience, insecurity, and especially hormones, but without future study, we may never know.
-grolman6
I wanted to comment on your blog because last month, I was having a conversationg with a couple of girls and we were arguing about these results. I have heard previously that cohabitation is worse for a relationship and increases divorce rate while my friend said she heard that it's better because you're testing the relationship out. Now, I know the answer and as someone who almost went through that, I can see why it's true.
I think you should read out loud the blog to catch a couple of minor grammatical mistakes. "There are ^a^ couple of main reasons..." and errors such as that. I know I make many of those as well.
I was also curious if any of your articles might be slightly biased because they seem to be from a religious university of they seem to have a religious agenda. Though I believe what they say is true, I was just curious about whether this would matter.
---happyfeet
I cannot emphasize how interesting and important this article is. The facts that you stressed out in this paper are also good for today's younger generation. I certainly agree with the negative outcome of cohabitation, it makes perfect sense to me. Cohabitation, in my opinion,is definitely wrong.
Mike
Your article talked about how cohabiting is not good at all and i have to agree with that. I have never been in that situation since my culture goes against cohabiting and maybe that is why I am not a big fan. Overall I have to say that marriage is the best way to go becaause then a person won't have to worry about unespected things happening that you are not ready for such as getting pregnant. You mentioned about how unmarried mothers are very stressed out well i think it's because they were not ready for a baby of course and on top of that the father might decide to walk out on them living her all stressed out.
etienne7
I thought this article was very interesting. People are always complaining about how much stress marriage can put on a relationship. I never really thought that cohabitation could have negative effects on a relationship as well. However I do believe that people should live together before they get married in order to make sure they can live together.
-grinste06
This article was really intresting. I never thought that there could be negative affects on people who are in a cohabitious relationship. It is intresting that even though they are not married, they can have the same stressors as someone who is. I think that cohabiting with somone is a good idea before marraige because it lets you get to know who they are and so on.
This was very interesting. I have not heard that cohabiting with someone could cause negative effects on our health. But I do not agree with you perfectly. As someone states, I also do not think that cohabiting with someone always causes negative effects. It may give a good chance to know more each other and to confirm their love. I think that how they spend the time of cohabitation is important.
I found this article really interesting and it suprised me in more ways than one. I was really suprised on how many negative effects of cohabitation there was. I do not really understand why there is a higher divorce rate of cohabitants because I would think that living with someone before they get married would make their relationship stronger; they would find out more about each other that way. I would like to know what married people think is different from cohabitating with someone, other than the financial "stuff".
-gablea7
very well written and interesting article. I think it would have been more interesting to know the break down of the age groups of the participants in the study. Maybe the trend of cohabitants in there early 20's and teens had a much higher divorce rate and a more negative impact on their health than the older group. It seems that the older one waits to get married the more likely he/she will stay married.
keov3
bio101
I enjoyed your article very much. As an expert in marriage and remarriage, I sing the praises of sharing how dangerous cohabitation is.
I wanted to fill in some gaps for you since several people were asking the questions, "why?"
The main reason that cohabitation is such a detriment is that while people go in with the idea of "trying it out to see if it works", this lower commitment level tends to linger even after they marry.
Research has found that women tend to view cohabitation very similarly as they do marriage. They view it as a big commitment. The problem lies with the men. Their level of commitment is not the same, and that lowered level continues into a marriage, making a divorce an easier decision.
Couples who wait to live together once their married, recognize for better or for worse, this is a decision they are making and are more likely to work at the marriage because the "escape clause" has never been present.
A better option for "trying it out" is a standardized assessment that will show couples where their strengths and weaknesses are as far as compatibiity and other aspects. I offer a great one for dating, engaged or married couples on my site if you are interested. It's located at www.RemarriageSuccess.com/couplecheck-up.htm
Thanks for the opportunity to share in a topic I feel pretty passionate about!
I found this article very interesting. I have always been a fan of marriage over cohabitation. I feel if you are going to spend that amount of time with someone you love than you might as well vow yourselves to eachother, also if you have the opportunity to share in something so sacred you might as well. It gives both of the people a better sense of security and a much better self esteem because they feel that they are definitely wanted and not being strung along until something better comes along.
-stephan6
bio 101
While I respect your personal belief in the importance of marriage, I thought it important to point out that your citations are primarily from groups associated with the religous right. Therefore the sources have a built in moral bias against cohabitation.
For an alternative view of cohabitation you can visit the "Alternatives to Marriage Project".
http://www.unmarried.org/
You'll also find a research report there that criticises the religous rights interpretation of the research on cohabitation.
http://www.unmarried.org/10problems.php
Here's one example of how the statisitcs have been skewed against cohabitation. This has to do with the alleged relationship between divorce rates and cohabitation.
_________________________________
1. The cohabitation report says:
"Living together before marriage increases the risk of breaking up after marriage" (page 4).
Yet the research the report cites on this isn't nearly as straightforward as its authors represent it to be. For instance, one study they cite (DeMaris and MacDonald, 1993) found that the only situation in which cohabitation is associated with a higher divorce rate is among "serial cohabitors" -- people who have cohabited with more than one partner. That's a small portion of all cohabitors. The study actually concluded that for first-time cohabitors who then marry their partners, there's no increased risk of divorce. Most of the fuss about this link is bogus.
Also, the National Marriage Project is misrepresents the research by saying that cohabitation increases the risk of divorce (implying a causal relationship). Some research has found an "association" between the two, but association is not the same as causation. Maybe a higher divorce risk makes one more likely to cohabit. Or perhaps there's some outside factor that causes both.
___________________________________
One of the biggest issues I have with the anti-cohabitation statistics offered by the religous right is they confuse a statistical association with causation. This is big mistake in any field of scholarly work.
In "umarried" report you'll find nine other issues with the view expressed by those against cohabitation.
While the author's intentions were regarding this blog post are irrelevant, the citations are indeed from a biased source and I think to use them here in a science class without indicating the presence of that bias is appalling. I respect your right to believe whatever you care to believe and I have no feelings about this particular subject one way or the other. But I do object to anyone passing off statistics in a science class that have a social or political agenda, in these case a religious one.
So, either your research was shoddy and you didn't delve into the source of your info or you just didn't care and then there is the possibility that you just thought we wouldn't notice. Shame on you!
CatherineS
Course Participant
WOW, reading this article was very interesting to me, and quite concerning at the same time. I am currently a cohabitator myself and am a little hesitant to accept these statistics. I have watched and observed my parents, along with the majority of other parents, neighbors, and friends through a divorce and I think I can say that relationships and marriages come with sacrifices. I think most people who are in a relationship can agree that there are strains, stresses, and problems within a relationship that need to be communicated and worked through. I have failed to think of the effects that cohabitation would have in a relationship, and now that I am...I would have never thought that it would have a negative effect.
I don't think that cohabitation causes divorce rates to rise, despite the growing rates of divorce and the even faster growing rates of cohabitation. I think that living with someone you are comitting to...especially one who you see yourself with FOREVER is a good way to get to know someone. You learn how they live and behave in a natural and personal setting, not just how they "act," and I mean act, on dates. You get to see them for who they really are. It is hard to pretend to be someone your not 24 hours a day in your own home.
I think the high divorce rates, like you said, are more due to the fact that people get married for the wrong reasons. People often stay in relationships--both marriages and dating--to fulfill financial obligations, emotional voids, expectations from others, to surpass some legal "laws" and other superficial and artificial reason. I think the if you are in a healthy relationship, for the right reasons then living together is only a resource to use to get to know eachother further. To spend more time together and work through problems, choirs, and daily responsibilities together.
I thought the article was thought-provoking and really gave poeple something to think about. Not just cohabitation, but what a healthy relationship is.
When I first started to read your blog I was really scared that living with someone was a horrible thing but further reading helped to show the true meaning of your title. I think that if one is in a healthy relationship and considering marriage I think it would be best to live with each other to see if they can tolerate each other's habits. I think a lot of people sort of jump the gun when it comes to marriage and that is why we see such high divorce rates. Overall I really liked reading this article and it was very enlightening.
Before reading this article I didn't know there was a scientific name to living with a member of the opposite sex while engaging in sexual activities. I always thought it was just "moving in". It's interesting to know that is can be detrimental to the relationship when the media glamorizes it so much. I had a question though, how about younger couples, you mentioned couples over the age of 40 cohabiting was a definite problem but what about early twenties or thirties, you need someway to know if the person you might spend the rest of your life with isn’t psychopathic.
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